When I Die
by Sheena Is A Punk Rocker
Summary: kind of a missing scene from "Another Girl Another Planet". Takes place after ch. 14... Songfic. JasperxBella. Doesn't actually involve character death if that's the reason no 1's reading...


**(Jasper's POV)**

Bells and I were lying on the couch in each other's arms when it happened.

Alice poked her head in through the door. "Jasper?"

"Yeah?"

She threw the phone at me and I caught it in one hand. "It's Charlie."

Bella's eyes got wide and I tightened my grip on her waist and sent a calming wave towards her. This was before we moved to Alaska.

I brought the phone to my ear. "Hello?"

I heard a muffled sob and then, "Jasper? It's me, Charlie. I uh- know that you were Bella's boyfriend and I don't know if you heard the news or not."

"What?" I asked, faking shock.

"Bells died. She got into a car crash." He started sobbing again and Bella buried her face in my shirt because she heard him with her new vampire hearing.

I rubbed her back gently while I answered Charlie. "Oh that. Yeah, Carlisle told me." It wasn't difficult to fake sadness.

"We're having her funeral next Monday. Renee and I would like you to speak, if it's not too much trouble. I invited Alice but she was too distraught." In reality, Alice just knew she would have to stay home to comfort Bella.

"It's no trouble at all. I'll be there," I replied before hanging up.

I heard Bella let out a strangled sob and I pulled her closer. "Shhh. Bells. It's okay. Shhh. Calm down."

The day of the funeral came up quickly.

Bella straightened my tie and looked at me sadly. "What are you planning on saying?"

"I have an idea. I'll be home soon."

She stood on her tiptoes to kiss my lips. I hugged her close to me. "Don't be sad Bella."

"How can I _not_ be? I caused them so much pain."

I rubbed her back. "It wasn't your fault. We had to tell them something."

She sighed. "I know." Then she pulled back to look at me. "You should go now."

I hugged her one last time before I made my way to my car, getting soaked in the rain.

The cemetery in Forks is beautiful, the constant rain making the grass a lush green, surrounding the aging headstones and bronze monuments...

I crossed the small cemetery lawn, past the tombstones from decades past and the unmarked graves of people no one remembered, until I got to her's.

Bella's grave. Only I knew that it wasn't really her in the coffin.

All of Forks, Washington seemed to be gathered around the grave. The mutts, Charlie and Renee, Angela, Jessica, Mike, Eric, Tyler, even Lauren showed up... and everyone was weeping.

I was glad for the rain so no one would see that I wasn't crying.

I sat in the front in one of chairs, everyone's sadness overwhelming me.

I barely heard my name being called, for me to go up and speak.

I took the priest's place in front of everyone and addressed the crowd. "I uh, didn't prepare a speech. But Bella once told me that she wanted this sung at her funeral. So, here goes."

I took a deep breath before I sang:

_Now I have finally accepted  
we will never stand in the same room  
I can never hear your voice of reason  
at least you didn't, didn't feel a thing_

_When I was younger you would tell me  
that I should wait to grow up  
that things don't go always as planned  
at least you didn't, didn't feel a thing_

_no you didn't, didn't have to feel a thing  
no you didn't feel_

_when I die I'll be fine  
cause I know you're always there  
when I die I'm alright  
cause I know you'll be there  
you are home_

_Now I'm standing at a crossroad  
don't know which path is calling me  
I wanna follow in your footsteps  
so you know you're never alone_

_no you didn't, didn't have to feel a thing  
no you're never alone_

_I'm still here but I'm waiting  
for our long conversations  
I'm still here but I'm waiting to go home_

_no you didn't, didn't have to feel a thing  
you are home_

Everyone was dead silent as I finished singing.

The rest of the funeral went by in a blur and before I knew it, I was walking towards my car.

But a hand on my shoulder stopped me. I turned around to see Renee behind me. "I just wanted to say how beautiful that was. Bella would have loved it," she managed to get out before breaking down crying.

I didn't know what to do, and luckily I didn't have to do anything because at that moment, Charlie came over to comfort Renee and I took that opportunity to run to my car.

Once I got there, I sighed and leaned against my car. "Tough, huh?" A voice said.

I jumped and looked up. It was Bella. "Bells? What are you doing here?"

"Shh," she said. "Get in the car."

I opened the door and slid into the driver's seat, Bella next to me. I was suddenly glad for the tinted windows in my car.

Once again, I asked, "What are you doing here, Bella? You're still a newborn. You shouldn't be here."

She stopped my rambling by pressing a finger to my lips. "I just _had_ to see Renee and Charlie again. Even though I couldn't say anything to them... but I just had to know that they were okay."

"They are. Just sad. And that sadness is probably never going to go away. But they'll be okay..."

Bella nodded. "I heard you sing."

"What'd you think."

"It was amazing."

I put the key in the ignition and started the car before saying anything else. "Are you okay?"

She sighed. "I'll be okay."

Instinctively, I grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze.

We held hands on the entire trip home. We were going to Alaska tomorrow. The trip had been postponed because of Bella's "funeral".

* * *

Bella and I were packing up the last of our possessions and stowing them in my car.

As I was carrying the last of my guitars out to the car, I noticed Bella standing outside the house, facing it.

I crept up behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist. "What'd you thinking about?" I whispered.

"About how many memories I'm leaving behind."

We stood there in silence for a few minutes, taking in the site of the old mansion.

"You ready to go?"

Bella turned her head to look at me. "I think so."

I let go of her and grabbed her hand. After one last glance at the house, we took off running to the cars.

We were leaving our old lives behind.

* * *

**A/N**: Ok, so kinda lame ass ending... but I couldn't think of anything else to write. Song was "When I Die" by New Found Glory. It's amazing. Listen to it. R/R

**Disclaimer**: Stephanie Meyer owns characters. New Found Glory owns song.


End file.
